It seems in our family that we don’t waste time doing much of anything. In the 3 short years that Zac and I have been married, we’ve moved 5 times to 3 different states and had a baby. For most of those 3 years we have been told what to do, where to go and when to do it by the military but now we find ourselves out “on our own” for the first time in our life.
We made our first huge decision this fall to stay in Ohio and try to make living in one state and Zac commuting to another for drill weekends and trips work out so that he could keep his job in Ohio, which has better opportunities for him. We also decided to move back into a house that Zac bought in 2005 and stop renting it so that we could finally settle somewhere. These decisions came somewhat easily as there was a clear feeling for both of us as to what we wanted for our life and these choices seemed to make the most sense.
Once we got our taste of freedom and a chance to make some choices of our own, there seem to be endless options for what else we want to do with our life now that we can control some of it. This brings me to the big one that has been weighing on our minds recently; when to have baby #2. For most families, baby #2 can be an easy thing to plan. You decide what your optimal spacing is and then go for it once you know that you are ready for the challenge of adding another little one to the family. For us it is a different story. Being that we are a military family, we have to face the challenge of how to fit deployments into our family planning. This is where we are having issues with the planning part.
This decision has become one of the most difficult things I have ever thought about and has truly been consuming my thoughts for months now. As it is now, Zac will be gone during our “ideal” time to have baby #2, so that has left us trying to figure out what is best – before he leaves or after? Do we have one before and then I'm alone with a baby and toddler or do we wait and run the risk of a 4 year spacing, which is not what we wanted? We have so many questions and thoughts as we try to figure it all out. We know we want the next one sometime soon, but how do we work it all out or is it even possible that we can make it all fit into our schedule when it is something that we do not have control over? What to do? I have so many more thoughts, we both do, but there is no way to get everything that is running through my mind down.
I feel like blogging about this because maybe it will give me a little more clarity on the situation, or maybe some of my fellow mama friends and military family could lend some advice. However, I believe that whatever does happen for us will be fine and will work out, I just wish it was a little easier to figure out! Sometimes it helps to get things out there into the world – so that is what I’m trying!
